Toni

So, it was Toni's last day at work today. I had been nervous and moody since the weekend. I think it was because I was not sure what would happen after her departure. Toni and I have known each other for almost two years. As you can see from my previous posts, we have had crazy times together. We got along really well. Our minds think pretty much alike. We even have the same taste in men! Toni is actually a few years younger than me. But she's always given me great advice. There is nothing she doesn't know about me-- good stuff, bad stuff, or juicy stuff... She gets to hear it all! She's always considerate and classy. You never see her in a bad dress! Toni is brave to do fun stuff. That's one thing I like about her. She brings good fun sides out of people. When we go out, she makes sure people she's with are entertained. I always feel comfortable hanging out with her even at a super straight place because I know we will have a good time together.

I don't know what tomorrow will be like without Toni sitting next to me. We would touchbase with each other every morning. We would then start our day. Not having anyone to touchbase with in the morning will be odd to me. I guess I would just go to my desk and hide myself there working all day-- no one to talk with, at least not the people I would have a great laugh with anyway.

Oh man... I will really miss her. Of course, we will be in touch. We will still see what each other is up to on Facebook. But it won't be the same as walking to the next cube and chat or going out, getting dressed up on a weekend.

Toni is a true friend and I am glad to have met her. Miss you already, TOni!

Why am I doing this to myself?

I am ridiculous. I hate myself sometimes. I hate myself for being unstable. I really do. This evening, Mr. A texted me asking what I was up to. I said nothing hoping that he would ask me to do something. He said he was going to the gym and swim. I asked if he wanted to hang out. He said yes. I was happy and all excited even though I had already had some plans. But I thought I would rather hang out with him.

The night came. He texted me after he was done with the gym. I went over to his place. We decided to go out for a drink. We went to this new bar and stayed there for about an hour. We then decided to go home. While we were walking out of the bar, I ran into someone I used to work with. Mr. A and he hit it off pretty well. The guy asked if we wanted to go back to the bar, Mr. A said, "Sure. Why not?" So, we decided to go back to the bar and hang out. Well, it turned out they hit it off pretty well. They had conversations between themselves. They left me out. They flirted with each other and all that crap. I was standing there like a fool. I then realized that I looked like a fool. So, I excused myself and asked Mr. A if it would be ok if he just dropped him off. He said, "Sure." So, I decided to leave them alone. Why would I want to be a third wheel anyway? So, I came home. I drove home by myself. It is ridiculous. I mean why Mr. A has to take all my gay friends. Why does he have to be attracted to all of them? I don't get it. And why do all my gay friends have to be attracted to him? I don't want to be a third wheel. I hate myself for being so unstable. I hate myself for being emotional for someone. It was not nice. But at the same time, I didn't want to be there crying. I didn't want to look like a loser at a bar. So, I left. I didn't feel very good about it. I was sad. I felt very little. I felt like I was not worth anything. All I could think of was to come home and cuddle with my dog. He would make me feel better. He would make me feel like someone loves me because of who I am.

It's late. I'm sad. But I have my dog in my arm. I'm ready for bed. I told Mr. A to not bother calling me tomorrow. I'll be fine. I'm done caring about other people. I'm done giving my heart to someone. I need to be strong and start taking care of myself. I hate my feelings like this. Why do I fall for Mr. A? Why? Why? Why?

Something is going right... for once!

Things have not been going right for me lately. Mr. A was snatched by who I thought was a friend. Work hasn't been going as planned. Things just have not really been on my side until this morning when I got a body composition done at the gym.

I try to get a body composition done every 4 months so I know where my body is at. It is a good sanity check for me. The last time I got it done was in November of last year. So, it's been about 6 months. I was nervous going into the "examination" room, but thought to myself what the heck. I've been doing pretty good in terms of exercising and dieting. So, I should be ok. But you just never know...

So the results are in...

Since November 2008, I lost about 1lb of fat and gained about 6lbs of lean body mass. That's equal to gaining about 5lbs. So, I'm standing at 135lbs with 6.4% body fat. My Body Mass Index (BMI) is 22.6 and Waist to Hip Ratio is 0.80. My waist, hip, and butt got bigger-- about an inch!! Woo hoo! :-)

I know you guys probably think I'm obsessed with these numbers. Actually, I kind of am :-P They make me feel good. They make me feel like I've accomplished something. They make me feel like if I work hard for it, I will then see the results. Don't you hate it when you work hard for something, but then things just start to fall apart and don't turn the way you expect them to? I've been in that situation and I hate it. But today, the body comp results really made me smile. In the next couple of months, I will try to get it down to 6%. I think that will be the lowest I will go.

They say the average body fat for men my age is 19%. So, those that have ditched me for some whimpy guys, you can just kiss my (bigger) butt!

The world has evolved and a chapter is closed

Oh man... it's been a while since my last blog. A LOT of things have happened to me. I've been so busy with work that I don't have time to write a blog. It is sad. Last month, I was working on a report. The idea of coming home and writing a blog just didn't sound appealing to me. So, that was why I was away from this blogging community for a while. Anyhow, I'm back. I'm still swamped. But I thought I'd jump on here real quick to close a chapter of what has been happening to me, which actually originated from my first blog.

Remember, Mr. A, the dude I went out on a couple of dates with last year and he then started dating somebody else a week later? Well, they broke up at the end of January. Since then, I got stuck in the middle (not in a good way, of course!). I became friends with both of them. And they are now not talking to each other. It's weird. It's odd. It's become this huge drama between them and I ended up having to listen to stories from both sides. Not fun...!

Anyhow, after their break-up, Mr. A and I started hanging out more frequently. He started to attract me again. What is wrong with me?! Why do I tend to fall for the wrong guys?! So, I started to get to know him better and started to like him more and more. Last weekend, I bought him his birthday dinner. We then went out hitting a couple of bars. We ran into Kamal and some of my friends at the last bar including the chocolate cake guy that Toni and I had run into at Power & Light district in a couple of episodes ago (remember him?). At the bar, the chocolate cake guy kept asking Mr. A for his number like 5 times. Mr. A was reluctant giving it to him, but eventually he gave it to him anyway. That night, we had to drive someone we barely knew home because he somehow lost his ride. We got a little lost driving to his place. The guy then said, "Oh. You could drop Jack off first and then drop me." WTF?! His place was obviously on the way to my house. So, it wouldn't make sense for Mr. A to drop me off first and then drop him off. Obviously, he was looking for something from Mr. A! Well, Mr. A was a pretty hot commodity that night. Regardless, we went ahead and dropped him off. While Mr. A was dropping me off, he wanted to have some water. So, he came in. We were watching TV for a little bit. Things then got a little touchy. We ended up cuddling on the sofa. It was getting late. So, I told him that he should stay here. He could either sleep in my bed and I'd sleep on the couch or vice versa. But I told him that he should sleep in my bed. He then said, "We both should go to bed". I said, "Sure. But we could just keep our clothes on and we won't do anything inappropriate." Well, once we got in bed, things got a little out of control. So, we ended up getting naked. One thing let to another. The next morning, we acted normal. Everything was fine. I got to think that day that he actually wasn't all that. He sure looks good in his clothes. But his body is not all that great. So, at that point, I was having no preference towards him.

The following Tuesday, he came over to help me with my bike since we were going to do a duathlon over the weekend. He told me the chocolate cake guy had been texting him and asked me if I knew anything about the dinner the chocolate cake guy was having that night. Apparently, they had been talking. The chocolate cake guy never invited me for the dinner that night. And I thought it was rude of him to all the sudden start texting Mr. A and snatch him from me! Whatever. He's just immature. Oh... and all the sudden, the chocolate cake guy started sending me text messages and messages on Facebook trying to be friend with me again. Whatever.

So, Mr. A and I went to Columbia, MO for the duathlon. It was a lot of fun. We then went to St. Louis after the race. We stayed overnight there and came back today. It was a good trip. We got to talk a lot about our personal stuff and our feelings towards each other. I very much enjoy his company. I've been wanting to do races like this. And I think he will be a good person that I can tag along and do stuff with. The only thing that I will have to detach from him is romance. I am the kind of person that can easily fall for someone. But at the same time, I don't want to ruin our friendship, the good times, and the good feelings I have towards him, especially with him being so unstable and having to deal with a lot of drama! So, on the way back to Kansas City, we got to talk and agreed that we should be just friends.

So, Mr. A and I started from going on a date. He dated someone else. He and I became friends. He broke up with the guy. He and I crossed the line. Someone else was interested in him. And now he and I will be just friends. The bitch can have him. Kansas City's gay scene is small. The world has evolved. The chapter between Mr. A and me is closed and has concluded with friendship. Time to move on, Jack. I keep telling myself that...

The Power of Facebook

Earlier this week, I was bored at home and started browsing people on Facebook. It was very addictive. You start looking at some goodlooking people's pictures and they are tied to someone else's like a spider web. It's crazy. I must have spent a good hour looking at people's pictures and profiles.

I, then, came to a realization that many people out there and I had many friends in common! It's weird. But the interesting thing is those people are not on my friend list. I don't know them. But how come my friends do? And how come I don't know them? Maybe my friends just don't want to introduce me to them period? Or maybe I just don't socialize with people enough? Of course, there are some interesting people I want to be friends with. But then, I don't want to know about them too much. Or, it would be some sort of stalking when I actually met them in person. Ok... that happened to Toni and me once. It was, umm, awkward!

Not wasting time

I am a true believer of "Life is too short. So, enjoy it!" I do my best to enjoy my life and be as happy as I can be. I do things that some people would think crazy. But to me, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone and it makes me happy, why not? You're born only once. You should enjoy your life to the fullest, right?

I lost a great long-time friend when I was in college. We had been friends since grade school. He had been suffering a heart disease. I remember him being so happy when we went to school together. I sat right next to him in almost every class. We would go to lunch together. His family knew me pretty well. He had to take a year off from school after a heart surgery. I remembered him looking forward to the surgery as he believed it would "cure" the disease. I visited him at the hospital the day after the surgery. He didn't speak a word. He didn't look very happy. His mother asked me to leave half an hour later. The guy loved going to school and playing soccer regardless of his heart problem. He was a great guy. He was probably thinking he couldn't play soccer anymore.

Every time I went to Thailand, I would visit him at his house. One day, about 11 years ago, I got a call from my parents telling me that his parents had called to let them know that he had passed away. When he was in the ICU during his last minutes, he was asking for me. I couldn't be there for him. I wish I had been there with him at the time.

Earlier this week, the mother of a coworker passed away because of cancer. She lived her life though. But it made me think again.

I don't know what's going to happen to me. I don't know what's going to happen to the people I love. All I can do is to do my best, enjoy the moment, and enjoy the company. I'm not thinking about the far future. I'm not going to be stuck with the past. I can't go back and fix the past. But I can make today better and learn from the past. I once again have promised myself that I will not let one minute pass by unrecognized. It would be useless and a waste of time. I'm not going to associate myself to disrespectful people. I think people should be friendly to each other and treat each other with respect. I'm not going to play that dating game where you're supposed to wait for 3 days or whatever before contacting him/her for a second date or whatever. If they don't call me in a day or two, hey, I'm moving on! I'm not wasting my time...! And trust me, if I like him, I'm calling him the following day to see if he wants to go out again... ;-)

Hectic week

It was a hectic week for me last week. Had to rewrite a report, review workpapers, make changes to the workpapers, etc. I was meaning to write several blogs, but didn't have devoted time. So, I am going to wrap everything in one blog...

When I came to work on Monday, I realized something was missing. Our dear coworker had left for the sunny California. The office's sense of fashion and humor definitely came down to almost below an unacceptable level! Everytime I walked by where she used to sit, I kept thinking of her. She was definitely missed.

On Wednesday, I got a friend request on Facebook from someone I didn't recognize. I accepted her friend request anyway. But I sort of had a clue as to why she wanted to add me as a friend. A couple of hours later, I got another friend request from the guy one of my coworkers was going to set me up on a date with (remember a couple of episodes ago where Toni shouted, "Did you like your chocolate cake?" yep, that was him!). We were supposed to go out with my coworker, her husband, and some of her friends on Thursday. I guess he wanted to check out my pictures and profile before he actually went to dinner with us? Fine. Whatever. I don't have anything to hide. Well, not what is on Facebook anyway ;-)

So, on Thursday, we all were supposed to meet at 7:30pm. I was fashionably late and arrived around 7:40pm. Got to the place and no one was there! Great! Got a call from my coworker saying they were running late but the guy and his roommate would be on time. Well, apparently, no one was on time. So, I sat at the bar and had a glass of wine. Around 8pm, everyone showed up at the same time! hmm... what a coincedence. Whatever! The guy showed up with his roommate... who had sent me the friend request on Wednesday. Pretty subtle, huh? umm... not.

So, there were 7 of us. We got a large table. The guy and I didn't get to sit together. So, it was a little bit hard to talk to each other. That's ok. I could talk to someone else in the group. I got to talk quite a bit with his roommate who was a little shy, but nice. It turned out to be a nice evening. Ironically, I ran into another friend at the bar. She had had a bad day at work and was there with another "coworker" (who happened to be quite goodlooking! ;-)). Anyhow, I talked to her for a bit and gave her a big hug. Hopefully, that would make her day/night a little bit better.

At the end of the night, the guy asked for my number and told me to give him a call so we could hang out again. I got home and got a text from him saying it was nice to meeting me. I sent a couple of texts back to him. Well, it was a good night.

Friday comes. A follow-up occured with Toni and the coworker. Toni said she liked the fact that the guy didn't wait to send a follow-up text after the dinner. Yeah. I liked that too. I don't like to play the waiting game. Life is too short. I don't have time to wait! We're not getting any younger, people!

So, late morning, I thought I'd send him a message on Facebook. The responses I got from him were just one-liners. No matter fact, some sounded like he was annoyed or something. So, I came to a conclusion that he might have changed his mind between Thursday night and Friday morning (maybe when he was dreaming) that he didn't want to go out again! Just my luck. I don't get it.

After work, I went to get a massage. I had never had this therapist before. Good thing I scheduled it for just an hour. He wasn't very good. What a waste of time and money. I told him my lower back and legs were tight and asked if he could concentrate on them. The guy spent very little time on my back and legs. Oh well... time to search for a new massage therapist. I hate looking for a new therapist. It's like looking for a neddle in the hay sack. Ugh.

When I was driving home after the massage, I got a text from Mr. A asking if I wanted to go for a run on the weekend. I had been planning on doing it already since the weather was going to be nice. So, I said yes and asked if he wanted to hang out that night. Long story short, we ended up going for dinner and a couple of drinks. The guy works like crazy. He had not slept for almost two days working on a report. When I met him on Friday night, he looked tired. I was surprised he was able to stay awake at dinner!

Mr. A arrived at my place at 10am on Saturday for the run. We ran for probably about 7-8 miles. The weather was perfect. A little windy, but we made it. I was surprised to run into a couple of coworkers on the trail. Mr. A was taller than me and has, of course, longer legs than me. So, to him, it was probably just a jog. But to me, it was pretty much a sprint most of the time! I am glad we did it though. I needed it. It was a good run for me (although he probably thought it was just a jog for him).

I had a relaxing, laid back Sunday. It was nice to sleep in, do some grocery shopping, walk around the Plaza, and have dinner with a good friend. It was just a nice Sunday-- a perfect way to end the week and start a new week. Sometimes, doing things in a slow pace and watching the world goes by is a beautiful thing.

The weekend

I was going to post this entry over the weekend, but didn't get a chance. It's snowing tonight. It's cold and I have nowhere to go. So, I'm writing a blog.

Toni was trying to get a hold of me several times via Facebook and text, but was not successful. What ever happened with the good ole phone call? I was having a long work out at the gym and didn't get her text until an hour later, I think. She asked if I wanted to go Costco stalking... then she corrected herself "shopping" ;-) I had wanted to go there to get some stuff for the house. So, I told her I'd meet at her place in an hour.

Did you guys know Costco had tons of eye candy?! Oh man, it was like a hottie central-- gay, straight, or taken-- they all were there! We were hoping to see the guy she had run into last weekend. But he was not there. Oh well...

Toni got a birthday present for her friend. I thought it would be a nice gift-- Amaretto and premium nuts :-) I wanted them for myself too!

So, Toni went to the party that night. I got a text from Mr. A asking if I wanted some Indian. Of course, I did! I had been craving some Indian food. So, I met Mr. A and his date later that night at an Indian restaurant. The food was good. The company was good. I don't know I thought it was weird that I just hung out with them. LOL.

After the dinner, we went to a nearby bar for some drinks. We got there quite early (around 9pm). So, there were not that many people yet. I got to talk to Mr. A's date and get to know him better. I actually liked him. He seemed like a nice guy. After a couple of drinks, a guy came to talk to us. He introduced us to his friend who I thought was pretty hot. They both were med students-- even hotter! ;-)

Around midnight, people started leaving to a dance club. Mr. A and his date had never gone to this dance club. So, I suggested that we all go there. My friends, Kamal and Homand, were supposed to meet us there too. They both are tons of fun! Kamal is super crazy. His clothing style is just unbelivable. He dresses like there's tomorrow :-) Later, I found out Homand knew the med student hotties. Small world, huh?

So, we go to the club. The music was good last night. We all went dancing. It was a lot of fun. At one point, Mr. A's date looked like he had something in his mind. So, I asked, "What's up?" He said Mr. A had been real quiet and didn't really say anything until I got to dinner. I was thinking, "oh my... I didn't know that. I've been having a good time." So, something was not quite right between them, I thought. Mr. A's date was quite a dancer. He loved dirty dance. Well, I could dirty dance too. I got the legs and quads for it! Don't dare me!

We stayed at the club until 2am. As we were walking out, Mr. A's date started tearing. I told him everything would be ok and that if he needed to talk, he could talk to me and I would add him as a friend on FB.

Sunday afternoon, I got a weird text message from Mr. A apologizing about that night. Apparently, they talked and "broke up". Mr. A decided to be "just friends" instead. hmm.... not pretty. I could understand how Mr. A's date felt. He drove over 2 hours to see him every weekend. I couldn't imagine what was going through his mind when driving back on Sunday. I felt bad for him.

It made me think of homosexual relationship. I would like to have a long lasting relationship. And when I say long lasting, I mean at least 5 years, not 5 days or 5 weeks! It is sad to see someone breaking up. And when you break up with someone, so much energy is taken away. You're sad. You're down. You're depressed. Then, after a while, you get back up. But you are still afraid of going on a date. You're afraid of getting rejected again. You're afraid the same things will happen again. You wonder if this person will be the same as the last one. You're not sure how to act. You're not sure what would be the right move. So, a couple of weeks ago, I decided to marry myself. Cut the cord. I'm happily married-- no need to look further. I'll let you all know when I'm ready to be single again.

The Pokemon Syndrome

Many of you have been wondering what the Pokemon Syndrome is all about. Like I mentioned in one of the previous episodes, Toni and I define this syndrome as a symptom where someone tells you they will hang out or do something with you, but backs out the last minute-- in most cases, intentionally. Toni and I have been noticing this syndrome in people around us lately. We think it's becoming a serious epidemic!

On Friday, a group of us, about 6 people, were supposed to go to lunch together. "It's just me - Daring to dream" was supposed to go with us as well. But she had to do something for her boss. So, she couldn't go with us. That was understandable. So, we excused her. Now, we were down to 5 people. As we were getting ready to leave, we asked another coworker if she was ready. Toni and I believe she has an uncurable Pokemon Syndrome, but still wanted to give her another chance. She then put her coat on and started walking with us. She asked if "It's just me - Daring to dream" was going with us. We told her no since she had to get some stuff done for her boss. That coworker then said, "Oh. Well, if that's the case, I'm not going then. I thought "It's just me - Daring to dream" was going." We were stunned by the response. I'm sure everyone was thinking "WTF?!" Of course, me being a smart ass, I shouted "Opsss... false alarm!" ;-)

I guess we are just not on people's priority list. But hey... who cares if we're on theirs... they, on the other hand, need to get on ours! ;-) And guess what? Toni and I came to a conclusion that we would not invite anyone to do anything anymore. If they want to do something with us, they need to act on it, be proactive about it, and reach out to us! After all, who in the right mind wouldn't want to hang out with fun, witty, and charming people like us? :-P

Honest Scrap Award?

I am honored to have received the Honest Scrap award from "IT'S JUST ME - DARING TO DREAM". She's my only blog follwer at the moment ;-) You all should follow her blog too. It is so much fun to read!

Anyhow, I take it she dares me to tell the whole world my little secrets. In order to accept this award, I'm supposed to accept two rules. You know what? Jack W never follows any rules. So, I'm acceping just one rule. And that is... "To list 10 honest things about yourself - and make it interesting, even if you have to dig deep!"

Here it goes...

1. I have always wanted to be a flight attendant. I have passion for flying and meeting people. But after having flown domestic flights in the U.S., I sort of changed my mind. Do I have to tell you all why?!

2. I used to wish I had been taller, but not anymore. I'm standing at just 5'7" (on a good day with the right shoes). But I've developed a thing for short people. I think they are cute and so I am :-)

3. I was a nerd up until grad school. So, when I got my Bachelors when I was 19 and Masters when I was 22, I thought to myself, "Screw you all those jocks. You bastards trying to get your high school diploma. I got my degrees and I am going to make money and look pretty now." So, I started going to the gym and transforming myself ;-)

4. After ten years of the transformation, it is still in progress. I work out almost everyday. I can't live without it. When I lift, I watch myself in the mirror to make sure I get the proper form. I watch what I eat. I watch my figure. I'm not so sure why. Maybe it's because I don't want to look like a nerd again? Occasionally, I look like a trendy nerd though. And that's intentional! 8-)

5. I have low self-esteem. Does that explain number 4 then?

6. I am a romantic person. Yes, you asked for honesty. AND... you got it!

7. When I choose my clothes to wear in the morning, every piece is thought of. Yes, I coordinate my under-shirt and under-pants so they match my outfit. You don't see them, but I (and some lucky ones) know they match ;-) Beauty comes from the inside, people!

8. I have a hard time choosing what to wear in the morning. It is common that I change at least 3 times before walking out the door. Yes, I admit I, sometimes, have a hard time deciding which underwear to wear with what outfit!

9. I used to worry about what people think of me. But then, I realized beauty was in the eye of the beholder and I couldn't force people to like me. So, I decided to be myself. What I wear or how I wear my hair doesn't hurt anyone. And if they don't like how I look, they can just turn the other way and stare at some typical boring midwesterners!

10. A lot of times, people misjudge me by the way I look. I am more than what you see. And if you get to know me, you'll know who I really am.

You'll know how sensitive I am.

You'll know how caring I am.

You'll know how down to earth I am.

You'll know how romantic I am.

You'll know how nerdy I am.

You'll know how determined I am.

You'll know how simple I can be.

You'll know I appreciate all these little things people do for each other and for this little place called earth.

You'll know I am a true believer of life is a journey and is too short to not be happy.

You'll know I don't take life for granted-- I work hard for it and I appreciate it.

You'll know the real JACK W.

The people who care about others... (part 2)

A couple of weeks ago, Toni told me a coworker had a friend who would be a perfect match for me. The coworker said he was "cute" and adorable. From my experience, straight people's "cute" is quite different from gay guys' "cute". So, I asked her if she had a picture of him. She said yes. Well, he was cute alright. Turned out I had seen his pictures from a friend's album on Facebook. I had thought he was cute and it would be nice to get to know this person. The coworker was surprised that I knew his name ;-) So, her cute and my cute matched. We could now move to the next step.

After she showed us his pictures, we've been trying to get him out to one of our outings. Per the coworker, he was extremely busy. blah blah blah.... Busy is not really in my vocabulary. It is more like an excuse to me. You can never be too busy to see or talk to someone if you really want to. You can always find a couple of minutes of your time to talk to someone. You can always find even 10 minutes of your time to hang out with someone. You can't pull that trick on me. I've used it to other people. I know how it works. No matter fact, I think I even invented that trick!

So, I was like... whatever... not going to put too much efforts into this dude. If he wants to hang out with us, great. If he's playing hard to get, bummer!

Toni celebrated her Name Day this Saturday. We went to La Bodega, a Spanish restaurant, in the afternoon for late lunch. It was nice and laid back. A lot of people showed up and really enjoyed themselves. That's always great. During lunch, Toni told me she had a perfect guy for me. She got me all excited. I asked if she had a picture or number of him. She said no (what the... ?!?!). She had seen the guy at Costco in the check-out line! Oh great. I am going to need to start hanging out at Costco more often to find the guy then!

In the evening, we were supposed to meet at a wine bar by the Power & Light district. I was running late due to an "event" with Mr. A and his date (I know... I know...!) ;-) Anyhow, when I got there, Toni told me that she just saw the guy that she had seen at Costco walking by the bar just 5 minutes before I arrived! Of course, she didn't run to get him or anything. No number again! Great. My luck. I should have gotten there earlier and asked for his number myself!

After the wine bar, we went out dancing at the Power & Light district until they closed. As we were walking to our car, Toni spotted someone who she believed was the guy. It was dark. So, we couldn't see very well. As the guy was approaching us, we got to see him better. He was cute. And I shouted out his name! Thanks to the wine and vodka!

He looked a little confused and said, "it's ......!"; he corrected me.
I was thinking... "umm... whatever. that still sounds the same to me!"
Toni asked him, "Did you enjoy your chocolate cake?"
The guy now looked even more confused.
Toni said, "You bought chocolate cake yesterday at Costco, didn't you?"
Now, the guy had some light on his face, but still looked puzzled, and said, "Oh yes, yes. I liked it."

Yep. It turned out this guy was the guy I had seen on Facebook and that our coworker was going to set me up with! I told him that our coworker knew him and showed us some of her pictures and we "recognized" him from the pictures ;-) And he was the same guy Toni had met at Costco! Toni said somehow the guy looked a little different from the pictures. I don't think so!

We didn't chat much as he was on the phone and was walking home, which we knew where it was ;-) We said goodbye and let him continue his walking. I'm sure as he was walking home, he was probably thinking how weird that was and how those complete strangers knew so much about him. No matter fact I'm pretty sure he thought we were stalkers! Hello, it was not intentionally! We just happened to have known his information before hand! I can't help that we are the people who care about others.

I guess I don't need to wait for the coworker to set me up with him. Toni and I did everything ourselves. Got to meet the guy. And I'm sure he thought we were freaks. Oh well... I guess I can cross this guy out of my "potential date" list. NEXT!

The people who care about others...

Toni and I are very much interested in getting to know people. We want to know what they do, what they like/dislike, what they drive, who they are, what time the eat lunch, whether they are busy, etc. Some people call that "stalkers", but we don't ;-)

When Toni and I went to the Power & Light district together the first time, Toni spotted this good looking guy-- as we were walking down the stairs, he was walking up the stairs. So, we and him had a little moment. I told her that the guy worked at our company and also worked out at the gym. That was probably why he was looking at us for a second. She got all excited.

Toni and I have a pretty similar taste in men. It is good for us because we won't be fighting over a guy. If he plays on her team, she can have him. If he plays on my team, then, he's mine! If he plays on both teams, well... we haven't figured that one out yet. But I sure will keep you all posted once we figure it out. Hopefully, we won't encounter any of those.

After the incidence, we ran into him at the cafeteria a couple more times. He was as gorgeous during the day as at night-- very charming and stylish, which is very rare in Kansas City! I caught him checking out Toni and her "girls" several times ;-)

I saw him at the gym 3-4 times a week, but never really talked to him. I overheard him talking to someone one time and I made a conclusion that he was definitely straight-- sport talk, you know? So, I thought he would be a good match for Toni and my mission would be to set them up! ;-)

Everytime I saw him at the gym, when I got back to the office, I'd give Toni a gym report telling her what he did today... blah blah blah... since we didn't know his name, we called him "Pokemon" (yep, as in the Pokemon syndrome in my second blog of the year). Over a period of two months, I made very little progress in gaining more information about him. All I knew was what time he usually came to the gym on what days, what time he usually left the gym, what cafeteria he usually went to after the gym, and what direction he usually went after the cafeteria. Hello people, I couldn't just go say hi to him as if I was hitting on him! Toni and I (along with a few coworkers that knew) got frustrated with the situation.

One day, Toni and I were supposed to meet in a conference room to work on a report. Toni was running late. She looked panicked when she got to the room. She said, "Jack, I just saw Pokemon walking towards our building! Where do you think he's going?". I immediately thought he might be going to the convenient store on the first floor of our building. So I said, "I think we should take a little break and go to the convenient store!" We both looked at each other and immediately got up, ran to get our coats, and ran down stairs to the store! When we got to the store, the guy was coming out and sitting on the bench outside the store. I was pretty sure we looked panicked as we didn't know what to do. Being as smart as we were, we had to pretend it was a coincidence and that we were going to the store. As we were opening the door, Pokemon said, "Hey. How's it going? I've seen you at the gym!" Of course, I was in shock and probably shakey too! He then introduced himself to me and shook my hand. I introduced myself and was getting ready to introduce him to Toni. Well, I turned around and Toni had already gone inside the store! That was awkward. I told him I'd be right back. So, I went inside and told Toni to come out. Toni decided to buy a bag of sunflower seeds as a "snack" so he wouldn't think we were stalking him. I had never seen Toni eating sunflower seeds!

So, Toni came out. I introduced them to each other. We talked for a while. Toni blushed. Turned out, he wanted to be an auditor. He asked if he could come sit with us to see what we do. We said, "Oh sure. That wouldn't be a problem at all. Maybe we can add you to the IM so we can keep in touch?" Smooth, huh? He gave us his full name so we could add him to our IM.

Perfectly executed! So, we "stalked" him (so what?!), but were not very successful. Somehow, he came forward and introduced himself to us. Weird, huh? That was one incidence. I'll tell you about another incidence that happened to us this weekend in the next episode.

To be continued...

American Idol

This week is the first week of American Idol Season 7. I have been following this show on and off. There is something about this show that makes people addicted to it. Part of it might be because the audience love watching and making fun of people that believe they are great singers and when they sing, they really suck! I mean, come on, you have to know how bad you are. Some are obviously bad. On the flip side, there are some really good ones on the show. I think this show is a good way for the record companies to get a great singer for a new album. Look at Kelly Clarkson, Jordan Sparks, and Jennifer Hudson, for example. They all have been very successful in their singing career. They all were exposed to the American people while they were on the show. And once they have their own albums, bam! Famous! These are some of the lucky ones. Some of the contestents have not been so lucky. Remember the teddy bear, Ruben? Not so successful, huh? Poor guy.

I got tickets from a good friend to see the American Idol concert when they were in Kansas City last year. I wouldn't have gone if it had not been free. I thought, "What the heck. It's a free entertainment and it's American Idol. How bad could it be?" It actually turned out pretty good. They all were very professional. And David Archuleta was super cute, just like on the show!

Back to Seanson 7, I was amazed at how many people came to the auditions for this season. Yesterday, they were showing the audition in Phoenix. There was one guy who was almost blind and came to the audition with his passion. He was a good singer. He could play the piano as well. I was blown away by this type of people. They inspire me. Maybe it's because I can relate their handicap to mine. They make me think of myself. This guy could barely see, yet had a big dream. And he was following his dream and making it happened. I've always been afraid of following my dreams and afraid of being rejected. I guess I will have to have a thicker skin and don't let little things bother me. If I'm rejected, so what? I'll just have to get up and try it again, right? And life goes on.

Tonight, they were showing the audition in Kansas City. It was in the summer. There were quite a few interesting people at the audition. One night that summer, I went out with a friend, Kamal. I'm sure I'll have an opportunity to officially introduce him to you all in a later episode. He's one of my hanging out peeps. Anyway, when we were drinking and having a good time, we met this guy who was from out of town. He looked different -- with a low mohawk on the head. He was cute actually. He told us he was in town for American Idol. Keep in mind we had had a couple of drinks already. So, we were like, "Oh cool! Did you make it to Hollywood?" He said, "Yes. And you all will see me there." You know how people at bars are. They just brag about themselves. We were joking with him for a while and then called it a night. When I was watching the tonight's episode, sure enough he was in the audition! He was there with his best friend. They actually did a little story about them. They both got to go to Hollywood. I was impressed by their talents. I remember him telling us he was there with a friend who was straight and that was why he had to come out by himself. I didn't really believe him at first. Maybe it was because it was at a bar and it was too good to be true? I guess once he becomes famous, I can add him to my list of celebrities I've encountered... along with Janet Jackson, Robin Williams, and Dennis Rodman!

The official first night out of 2009

Toni and I declared last night as our official first night out of the year. Although we had gone to dinner the first weekend of the year, we didn't consider that a "night out" as we didn't really hit the clubs. Plus, it was the night where we had dinner with Mr. A and his date. Remember my last post? Yeah... that was brutal!

Our plan was to gather several people at Toni's, have some pre-bar drinks, and then go out. Towards the end of last week, one of our cowokers who was supposed to go out with us somehow announced on Facebook that she was considering going out of town for the weekend. Great. People would just stand us up like that! Speaking of priorities...! So, that left Toni and me sort of hanging as we had to change our game plan. Of course, we still wanted to go out.

On Saturday, my face was "acting up" (for lack of better words). It got sort of flakey and peeling. What had happened was I had exfoliated my face last weekend and then went out running in the sun. While running, the sunscreen started wearing off as I was wiping the sweat off my face. So... a week later, I started seeing the consequence of it! After all these years of exfoliating my skin, you would think I would have known better. Nope. Long story short, I didn't feel like going out showing off my peeling face. So, I texted Toni and told her the bad news. She texted me back saying, "Sounds like a Pokemon excuse. Put some lotion and stop being such a baby!" (Toni and I came up with the definition of the Pokemon syndrome where people tell you they'll hang out with you, but then they cancel you last minute-- for instance, our coworker mentioned above!) I thought, "Well, I was going to a straight bar anyway. What the heck." So, I agreed to still go out with her. We decided to meet at her place at 10pm.

Toni had started her night at a birthday party. So, she was all set by the time I got to her place. Her dress that night was just stunning. I thought all the straight guys would be all over her "girls" if you know what I mean ;-)

We then knocked on her neighbor's door for pre-bar drinks. Being such a lady, of course, Toni brought her own Rasberry Vodka and a bottle of Sprite. We successfully pursued her neighbors (three of them) to go out with us. Sweet! So, the five of us got in the car and went to the Power & Light district where all the straight kids hang out these days.

It was freaking cold that night. Good thing the bar was inside. They had a pretty good crowd last night. Quite a few cute guys and girls, I thought. The bar we like to go to plays 80's music. Yup... Barbie Girl, Spice Girls, Michael Jackson... you name it! Toni and I take the dance moves and sing along very seriously at this place.

As I was dancing, there was a girl playing with my hair. I took that as a sign of "Hey... I think you're cute. Let's dance." Toni was off somewhere else. So, I, by default, ended up dancing with her. What was I supposed to do? Honestly, I didn't mind dancing with her. I thought it was fun. But was I supposed to do anything else? Was I supposed to ask for her name or her number or kiss her or play with her hair back? If I was, I didn't do anything of that. She was a cute girl, but not really my type... err, actually, not my cup of tea. Sorry...

It is really odd to me. Everytime I go to a straight bar, I get hit on by girls. I must be at least decent looking. And my dance moves are probably not too bad. But, how come I've never been hit on by a guy at a gay bar? Is there something about me that attracts women, but not men? If you know the answer, let me know. I need to do some investigation on that.

I think everyone had a great time last night. Toni's sister and her boyfriend joined us later on. They are such a cute couple. Honestly, I thought the music was just ok last night (they always play the same music every week over and over again). The crowd was alright. But I think it was the company that made it a great time. We enjoyed ourselves. And that was what mattered.

We'll see how many parties we are going to have this year. Tomorrow is Monday already. I'm sure interesting things will happen to me next week. For now, gotta get ready for the big week...

2009 is here!

Lots of things happened to me in 2008-- good and bad, just like everyone else. Bought a house and moved in with a "roommate" and two cats. My parents came to visit and help with settling into the house. That was fun. The "roommate" and cats are now gone. So, it's just me and a quiet house. It is good in a way-- I don't have to worry about them anymore when I'm away. Toni and I became good friends last year. We got along really well. We had a blast working and having "team building activities" at inappropriate places together. Couldn't get any better! Well, actually, it did. But I'll write more about what happened in later episodes when the time is right.

So, it's 2009. It's been just a little over a week. Funny things have already happened to me. Went out with someone a couple of weeks before Christmas. Let's call him Mr. A for now. Later that week, Mr. A started dating someone else. Great. Just my luck. The funny thing is... we still hang out. It's weird. Last weekend, we hung out and had a great time-- just the two of us. Then, in the evening, Toni and I were going to dinner. Well, with me being nice and proper, I accidentally invited them to join us-- not thinking they would actually show up. Umm, they did. The dinner was interesting. At least, I got to see what his date looked like. Nothing comparable to me, of course. Toni and I looked fabulous. We played hosts. I thought we were great entertainers.

Last Sunday, I had lunch with another friend. Told him about what had happened and how unsuccessful my dating scene had been. He recommended that I be less put together-- gotta dress down, drive a junky car, be stupid, be bitchy, stop going to work, and be anything that doesn't show a sign of success. His theory was success scared people-- and it really intemidated your potential significant others. Maybe he was right. I've been seeing a lot of couples that are like that these days-- a successful one with a not-so-successful one. Why can't they both be successful and happy? I'm sure there are a lot of couples like that out there. But I just haven't really seen them in Kansas City. Even if there are, all the good ones are probably taken anyway. Why would I care?

So, I turned to Facebook. I've been on Facebook quite a bit lately. I think that's what you do when you are single. You try to talk to your digital friends. You try to keep up with what's going on in their lives. And most importantly, you update your status like every 15 minutes so they "know" what you are up to, hoping they would call you up for a date. That's a great marketing tool! Your name and status are out there, come on. So far, nothing has happened-- just some witty comments on my statuses here and there. Ridiculous! People are just NOT getting it!

2009 is still young. My bedroom has been repainted with a Restoration Hardware color (fancy!). I'm hoping with the color and the new look of the bedroom, there will be more actions. But we'll see. Somehow, I am not seeing it happening in the near future. Toni recommended that I consult the tarot cards. Maybe I should. All I can tell you right now is... I am excited about 2009. There will be a lot of crazy things happening to me this year, I'm pretty certain. I look forward to it. Of course, I'll keep you all posted!

Have a great weekend.